Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Hi, my name is Heidi, and I am a carb addict.I’m kicking off this blog with my carb addiction. Without a major change in my diet, I would not have even been able to consider getting back into exercise. I need to remember what life is like when I am “on carbs”. I hope that sharing my experience might help others who have similar issues to not feel so alone. This blog is not about advice, only about my experience.

“Carb addict” sounds a bit dramatic, but that’s exactly the way I feel when pasta, bread, and desserts are a normal part of my diet. The more carbs I eat, the more I want, and the more out of control I become. That’s how it works for me.

It's possible that cutting sugar out of my diet helps. Or maybe processed foods. Or perhaps I have a gluten intolerance, or another food allergy. Regardless, I'm going to lump it all into "carbs" which, for the purpose of this blog simply means most carbohydrates.

After reading about Atkins years ago I’ve dabbled with low-carb eating (LC) now and then over the years. The benefits were nice (weight loss, reduced cravings) – but I always went back to a carb-rich diet. In the past year my carb consumption and negative effects moved into a whole new level. I had constant cravings and would binge very frequently. The binges made me feel physically crappy, not to mention really ashamed of my behavior. I would be eating a Krispy Kreme donut and thinking “what the hell am I doing, why am I eating this?!” – but I just ate it anyway… 6 donuts later I was even more unhappy than beforere. Insane.

I recently went LC again for about 6 months and felt awesome. Then I decided to “take a break” for a while. I figured I’d been binge-free and low carb fo so long, Ideserved a ‘time off’… But the results were awful. One day turned into several months of madness. “Like a monkey on a cupcake” is a good way to describe the way I felt towards carbs.

I’ve decided to to go LC for good, as a life-long strategy. The difference now is that instead of just wanting to lose weight, I have actually experienced concrete physical and psychological improvements that are clearly connected to eating carbs. This time, I wish to take a more deliberate approach. First: I will start off with a list of various negative symptoms I had before I cut out the carbs, since I have a tendency to forget how bad I was really feeling on the big carb plan.

Before: On Carbs vs. Now: Low Carb

Before: I needed at least 9 hours a night. I had to nap mid-day because my eyes just slam shut on their own I’d get so groggy.

Now: 6 to 8 hours a night, wake up feeling rested, no naps needed at all. Awake and alert ALL DAY.

Before: Major mood swings daily – and most of them low. Monthly depressions regularly.

Now: Mood is even – surprisingly even – every day!

Before: Bottoms of my feet hurt when walking barefoot, sore Achilles tendons, ankles and significant swelling after just moderate exercise. Calves always tight and sore, even without exercise. Fingers would swell like crazy just going for a brisk walk.

Now: Those symptoms are GONE. Calves get sore appropriately after a workout that involves them!

Before: A hamstring injury nagged me for YEARS! It was painful all day, almost every day.

Now: The hamstring that was injured now gets slightly more sore, but only when I exercise it, and it recovers quickly.

Before: Neck and face had breakouts almost continually. Very frustrating.

Now: Skin is very clear!

Before: I thought I was alert and clear… until I removed the carbs. Then I realized that I was foggy, easily confused AND I swear, 50 IQ points below where I am when I’m low carb.

Now: Thinking is much faster, clearer, and I’m able to process information much more quickly.

Before: I really felt like a drug addict when it came to carbs. They consumed my mind and attention, and my willpower to abstain was zero. I binged frequently (I could easily eat a whole box of cereal, no joke).

Now: My cravings are totally different. They don’t consume me. Once in a while I think “I’d like a milkshake.” and I have one. I feel a little crappy afterwards, but I choose items that have the smallest negative impact I can find. It’s a work in progress, but I do feel like the more carbs I eat, the worse the cravings become. I’ve tossed all the trigger foods and I’m fine with that.

Before: Numerous negative digestive issues: bloating, gas, and various other issues that I don’t care to post here…

Now: No gas. No bloating. No ‘other’ issues. I am very happy.

Before: Eating sugary foods and simple carbs always left my teeth feeling fuzzy. I used to bite my tongue and inside of my lips all the time, and then I’d get a sore, and keep biting it over and over (drove me nuts!). My tonsils are unusual – they’re pretty visible and always looked swollen.

Now: No more fuzzy teeth, no more biting my own mouth, and my tonsils now look about 1/2 the size as they did before.

Before: I guess because of all of the weirdo symptoms I was experiencing, it sapped my motivation too. My desire to live life was minimal at best. I would describe my attitude towards work and social life in one word: Avoidance.

Now: I’ve made a complete turnaround. I’m motivated, engaged and excited. I won’t lie, some tasks and social events are still not my all time favorite, but I have the will to just do them and I always end up very happy I did what I needed to do.

Before: For the past 5 years or so I noticed a marked increase in hair loss. I didn't think much of it because I generally have thick hair and lots of it. But I'll tell you it was a LOT of hair that would be left in the bathtub after towel-drying my hair.

Now: Very little hair seems to be leaving my head, as compared to before.

Before making this latest move back to LC eating, I went to see a nutritionist. I took baseline blood tests, was tested for Celiac and food allergies. The nutritionist was convinced that I was Celiac or gluten intolerant. I got tested (not the gene test for Celiac, however) and came up negative for ANY food allergies. She did say that might happen. Celiac is a pretty serious issue because it affects the villi in your small intestine which can lead to malnutrition, as well as other pretty crummy symptoms. Apparently there is a gene test I could take… That’s the next step just to be sure. If it is Celiac, there are a whole host of reasons why it will be crucial for me to stick to the plan for life. But I'm not there yet.

Blood tests are only part of my story. Maybe I am Celiac, maybe I’m not. But how I feel has a much greater impact on my behavior. When I cut out carbs for the most part I feel great, and I don’t have cravings. When I consume carbs, I want more carbs and feel like crap.

This time around I’m seeking out support. The timing couldn’t be better… Atlatna Kick is offering a new goal setting program called Headstrong, and I’m going to be it’s very first member! There are lots of great books and websites I can turn to, and I’m going to learn to make some more ’sweet’ LC items (desserts for example) that will help me enjoy a treat now and then without negative side effects.

I’m going to have support to help me reach my goals. I just have to keep in mind that the more often I try and fail, the more often I learn how NOT to do something. It’s a journey… and I will maintain my black belt attitude towards this one.

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